Christian Recovery

18. God promises a new heart.  How does this happen?  What is He referencing?  How can you pray that someone with a hardened heart reaches repentance?  How can God soften someone’s heart? Incorporate this with forgiveness.

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A leather-bound Bible was hurled through the air, and after hitting the edge of a table, it fell to the floor. I glanced under the table and saw its flimsy pages flap open and flutter until they stilled like a dying bird laying on its back. While I stared, there seemed to be a hint of life in this book called the Bible, which I had never read. No one was struck down by lightning, and we all managed to avoid plagues, at least I believe so.

This simple 3 second episode happened at East London University in 1999. I was a mature student studying for my literature degree. It was the professor who threw the Bible. Before my studies I was a bricklayer working hard on building sites throughout London, until a searing pain in my back called sciatica struck me down, which gave me no choice but to search out a new career. When looking at the Bible taking its last breath while it lay upturned and spread eagled on the floor, my mind flashed back to my local sweet shop, as a much younger boy, while holding my big sister’s hand.

“You can have sweets from the penny box over there” she said while my gaze was firmly fixed on the larger chocolate bars that were leaning just out of reach.

“Can have one of those”

“No, come on choose we haven’t got all day”. After making my choice we left the shop where I was more upset than when I walked in.

The situation while sat around a large table at university was similar. There it was, something I desperately needed (the Bible), which was just out of reach, for the moment anyway.

The professor had told us that we must pick a narrative from the table that had shaped society; and discuss. On the table there was approximately 25 books to choose from. The books had been tipped from a box by the professor before the lesson began. Being put in groups of four we were given an hour to present our case on why these narratives are so important to society. The books on the table were from Shakespeare, Darwin, Freud, Marx, Jung, Austen, Dickens, the Bible and more grand narratives that I fail to remember. On seeing the Bible the professor said ‘who put that there’ and with anger he threw it across the table.  Similar to the sweet shop it seemed when something is placed out of reach, I just want it more.

The professor did me a favour that day, it was clear that the Bible had a living power after all, making him behave like that. How could a man with such standing in our community do such a thing? What repelled him to act that way? Maybe it was more than just a book after all, with all that repellent energy puppeteering the professor.

My re-birth and search for a new heart began that day, although I never knew this at the time, it’s only when looking back I can see the whole picture. The spark was cracked from an angry professor throwing a Bible, and so within a few weeks I picked it up and started reading. Just like those chocolate bars the Bible was now within my grasp.

It didn’t take much reading before I realised that to understand Gods word, I would need guidance. To have Jesus transplant a new heart could only be achieved by those that already have new hearts put in place by the Spirit of Truth. To be around people that knew the scriptures and how to take a fledgling like me through the good book with a loving and faithful understanding of the Word was paramount.

As it is written: “How beautiful are the feet of those who bring good news!”

(Romans 10: 15)

At the time there seemed to be something so utterly different from my own Bible reading to having the words spill out of the mouth of a mature Christian, either male or female. It really was identical to early morning bird song. The Alpha course meant nothing at all until maturity took the stand where the versus came alive, literally with a heartbeat all of its own. It appears rather like when musical notes are played in the wrong order, then nothing makes sense. We press our palms to our ears.  Played in the right order by a musician however, we can feel the beat. When we learn to see that Biblical words are all in place as God had intended them to be, total coherence and oneness with the universe takes place. We sit back and listen, learn and finally read and consume. We are all in rhythm with His voice.

Jesus said “where two or three gather in my name, there I am with them” (Mathew 18: 20).

The most mature of the group is not always the eldest, as in physical age, but was certainly bound in wisdom, which is a large part of the ingredient needed to sustain spiritual growth for new seekers of the Word.

That’s the Bible, where the words become tangible and alive transforming a human being from death to life, which is the change of heart.  We are turned inside out.  It is the re-birth and baptism that Jesus tells us about.

In John 3: 1-3 we are told

Now there was a Pharisee, a man named Nicodemus who was a member of the Jewish ruling council.  He came to Jesus at night and said, “Rabbi, we know that you are a teacher who has come from God. For no one could perform the signs you are doing if God were not with him.”

³ Jesus replied, “Very truly I tell you, no one can see the kingdom of God unless they are born again.”

The re-birth was painful, but with joy beyond measure at the end, which paradoxically was my new beginning, if you get my drift. Pain, I found out, was a touchstone to growth. To talk, declare or be resolute about anything was easy with words alone, but to feel those words deep within was the hard part, and confessing my sins or defects was certainly not stress-free either. These discussion regarding the self always materialized during the Bible study, it was how we grassed up our sin, our histories.

Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. (James 1: 2-3)

There is a difference to what we say comparing to what we actually mean from the heart, which is the symbolic base of all emotions. Life becomes full and justified through the depth of God’s word, which can only be loved into place by consuming Jesus on the cross.

During our prayer meeting one young lady received prayer and had changed, or was born again if you prefer, in one night never to drink again. I myself never took another sleeping tablet, or pills to put a swerve on my alcoholism, it all stopped with a change of heart that became shaped and filled with God’s word. It all stopped when the Bible started a new tempo in my very being.

The new heart transplant boomed a new story in my chest. I hope one day to look under a microscope to see the infinitesimal atoms that I breath in are formed like micro letters, all travelling around my body in the shape of the right words being placed in the right order by the Holy Spirit.  Jesus was the Word made flesh (John 1), which allows my heart to be made up of His words Amen.

For the word of God is living and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart. Nothing in all creation is hidden from God’s sight. Everything is uncovered and laid bare before the eyes of him to whom we must give account.
(Hebrew 4: 12-13)

When asked what happened to me and how do I look so different? I always point toward Jesus, then suggest for those who ask to find a home group from within a solid church where a small assembly can meet up weekly to study God’s word, to pray and have fellowship with other Christians.

Re-learning is key, and to do this we must listen like a child first in school.

He called a little child to him and placed the child among them. ³ And he said: “Truly I tell you, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. (Mathew 18: 2-3) 

My inner self had been refreshed, so I was in one sense running along on childish fears. With a feeling of exposure like being stripped where the cold wind bites hard at your skin. It is certainly not good to remain in this exposed state for long, so best get on with your studies and re clothe yourself in God’s garments.

In the Old Testament people often vented grief by tearing their clothes. They felt destined to give to God and others around them a show detailing how upset they were about their sin.  God however, cared more that they grieved from within their hearts to the point of weeping and mourning.

When the Lord calls to Israel, “return to me with all your heart, with fasting, with weeping, and with mourning; and rend your hearts and not your garments.” (Joel 2: 12-13)

Looking up to Jesus and ripping a garment now-a-days would certainly not make a squat of difference, other than make Him roll His eyes perhaps. Would He mouth the words with exaggerated lip movements while pointing His loving finger at you “I can see your heart, you must repent”?

To be sure, you will find many Christians who clothe theirselves in Christ and through them we can all find a place to atone our sinful nature. You give them your old words and ways, and they will guide you toward the fruits of the Spirit.

But the seed on good soil stands for those with a noble and good heart, who hear the word, retain it, and by persevering produce a crop. (Luke 8: 15)

Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly as you teach and admonish one another with all wisdom, and as you sing psalms, hymns and spiritual songs with gratitude in your hearts to God (collosians 3: 16-17)

When we seize the rebellion and break from the flesh and draw in the Spirit, we find that the power many people had had over us throughout our lives dissipates into thin air. Resentments are no longer re-sent by the devil. It just happens without any help from us, it is God working within. Never again do I forgive with white knuckled prayer, but pray for my attackers with ease in hope that they never harm another soul. In my prayer I ask

“God, give those that beat me peace so that they never hurt another person. Lord let them breath in what you breath out”.

It really is that easy, but we must remember that to grow in Gods word Jesus told us to gather together, but also to pray alone. When we are amongst mature Christians we grow, but when alone our prayers can resonate from a more genuine heart.

But when you pray, go into your room, close the door and pray to your Father, who is unseen. Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you. (Mathew 6: 6)

                                                            Thank you:  Graham Hevey